come into my body

I dont know how more people haven't got mental health problems
Thinking is one of those stressful things I've ever come across
And not being able to articulate what I want to say drives me crazy
I think I should try and read more books
And learn some new words
My sister used to read the dictionary
I'm going to start with that
I'd like to travel
I want to see India and the pyramids
A whale and that race with all the bicycles in France
I'm not sure about rivers, they scare me
But I love swimming, I'm good at it
And when I swim I think about numbers
And count the laps
When I was younger I saw a house burn down
And I walked past it everyday for the next six years
Derelict, black, chalky and dangerous
I wondered if squatters lived there
I'm still not sure but I know there were never any parties cuz it was shit
After a while the council got round to tidying the town
Making it less offensive here and there
They said it was an eyesore so they tore it down
Behind the house was a wall with a few bits of crabby graffiti and the word 'Cunt' written on it in giant letters
And now I walk past that
I like sitting in the park
And I like walking through it
I like taking my dogs there
And friends, and I like being alone
I like flowers and simplicity
I like compassion and thoughtful gifts
I like being able to shout
But I wish I could be quiet
When I'm quiet people think I'm sad
And usually I am
Sometimes when I'm at a busy train station
Somewhere big with the noisy trains like Kings Cross
I feel like putting down my bags and shouting things out because I've got something to say
Don't you want to share the guilt?
Don't think, just try and sleep